Going into The Testaments finale, Becka’s fate was precarious. After murdering her father in a rogue act of justice in the penultimate episode, Gilead’s most reluctant wife-in-training was taken by the Eyes (Gilead’s police) after her best friend’s Commander father revealed her location.

Mattea Conforti, who plays Becka, had explained to The Hollywood Reporter that her violent act of vengeance proved her deeper feelings for that best friend, Agnes, who is played by Chase Infiniti in Hulu‘s Handmaid’s Tale sequel series. After Agnes confided in Becka that Becka’s father had sexually assaulted her, similar to others, Becka took matters into her own hands to protect Agnes, and Conforti says she went into this finale aware of how Gilead handles murderers.

“I think a part of her thinks, ‘This is it. This is the end,’” she tells THR.

But, it wasn’t. Instead, Conforti now argues that Becka was handed an even worse fate: Marriage.

In the final episode of season one, titled “Secateurs,” Becka’s mother takes the blame for her daughter and is murdered, and Becka is married off to a Commander — Garth (Brad Alexander), who is actually a secret crush of Agnes’. But before her wedding, Becka and Agnes share a kiss. The scene, directed by Mike Barker, finally brings Becka’s seemingly unrequited feelings to the surface, and creator Bruce Miller credited his two actresses for getting the pivotal moment right.

Below, Conforti shares her interpretation of what that kiss means to the two friends, as Becka now becomes a Gilead Wife and Agnes returns to Aunt Lydia’s (Ann Dowd) training school after being rejected for marriage — but is armed with the empowering information that her real mother is June Osborne (Elisabeth Moss) heading into the already renewed season two.

Is Becka’s fate actually worse? She thought she may have to die and be punished an eye for an eye for killing her father. Instead, her mother takes the blame and is murdered and…

Becka is married, yeah…

She looks more depressed walking away from her wedding.

Yes, for Becka, this is the worst possible case scenario. I think after she kills her father and then all that happens and she’s taken by the Eyes, a part of her thinks, “This is it. This is the end. And you know what? The light at the end of the tunnel is that I never got married and I escaped the fate that I thought I didn’t have a choice to get out of.”

However, unfortunately, we learn that not only does she have to get married but her mother has to take the blame in order to save Becka, which shows an undying act of a mother’s love for her child and how ironic Gilead is in the how women take the consequences of men’s actions. That being Becka’s father [who instigated all of this], it rocks her entire world. If anything, Becka is more lonely married and still alive than if she was punished.

What is your interpretation of Becka and Agnes kissing? Are they acting on feelings and acknowledging a deeper love, or was it a goodbye?

It’s hard. We had a lot of conversations about that kiss, because that is such an important moment for their relationship and, what’s the story we’re trying to say from Becka’s point of view versus Agnes’? What we landed on was that Becka has nothing else to lose in this situation. Her father’s dead. Her mother’s dead — and she’s getting married. There’s no alternative, and there’s no way out of this marriage. She’s about to walk down the aisle. So there’s nothing else, really, for her to lose.

She initiates going in for a kiss as a way to show one last effort to Agnes, to say, “I love you. We’re in a world where we can’t be verbally explicit about our feelings but maybe I can show you.” I think Agnes finally realizes the love that Becka has for her and reciprocates the kiss back as a way of saying, “I support you, I’m here for you. I love you. You’ll always have me.”

And Becka pulls away from the kiss as acknowledgment of, “Thank you for being there for me and being my friend.” But it’s also what Becka may think of as a goodbye, because her life has now started as a wife and it’s all ending for them. That’s how we interpreted that scene.

It’s written all over her face. Did you do alternate versions of how you would end that scene?

We did. We were trying to figure out how to best communicate the fact that Becka has these sedatives in her system that are going to make her stop resisting and walk down the aisle — so we didn’t want the kiss to be fatigued by the drugs she’s on. We wanted that to settle in right after. So me leaning my head on her shoulder and then looking up is me finding one last piece of comfort with Agnes, but then also exiting whatever situation I’m in right now.

How will this change everything for season two, now that Becka is a wife?

I don’t know. I really hope that her and Garth can have some cool conversations about Mayday [the resistance movement]. I would love to see if Becka could get involved in the rebellion. I’m hoping she could have another honest conversation —  it could be with Daisy [Lucy Halliday] again, but a conversation like she had in episode five about who she is, what she’s struggling with and her feelings in the world.

Bruce and his writers are currently working on season two. Do you have a timeline yet for shooting season two?

I don’t. All I know is that it’s happening, and I’m really hoping that it happens soon! I want to dive right back in. Watching the show again. I’m like, “We gotta go. We got to start shooting.”

Do you think Becka will find out quickly in season two about Hannah’s real identity, and that her mother is June?

I don’t know if Garth knows. That would be cool if they find out together, having family dinner or something one night. That would be interesting, if Becka found out. I’m hoping she has a lot of moments with the girls, even though she’s a wife now. I hope they can stay as connected as they were in season one.

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The Testaments is now streaming season one on Hulu. The writers are in the room working on the already renewed season two — read our chats with creator Bruce Miller and Elisabeth Moss after the finale.