The parenting warning Princess Eugenie can’t ignore after welcoming baby daughter
As Princess Eugenie and Jack Brooksbank settle into life as a family of five, a child psychologist reveals why Ernest may look to big brother August for support
rincess Eugenie and her husband Jack Brooksbank are enjoying their baby bubble with their newborn daughter, whom they welcomed in Portugal on 3 August.
While helping her settle in at home with their two sons, August, five, and Ernest, three, can look idyllic from the outside, there are lots of more difficult dynamics that Eugenie will be quietly navigating. One of the key ones is ensuring that her sons do not feel pressure to take on the role of a “good big brother,” according to Dr Sasha Hall, a child psychologist with 20 years of experience.
She spoke exclusively to HELLO! about how Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor and Sarah Ferguson’s daughter and her marketing executive husband may be forced to address Ernest’s transition from being the doted-on youngest child to the middle child. This change could see him exhibit “temporary regression” in his behaviour or turn to his big brother for help…
August and Ernest’s different approaches to a sister
Princess Eugenie has previously described her sons as a “little team”, confessing that her transition from one child to two was relatively smooth. After Ernest was born in 2023, the doting mother gushed that “Augie is loving being a big brother already.”
This could be a factor in why the young royals will have very different reactions to their baby sister, whose name has not yet been shared publicly.
Dr Sasha pointed out that August will not only struggle to remember a time when he hasn’t been an older brother, but that there is also an “important developmental difference” between him and his brother.
© Princess EugenieWith two extra years of experience processing his emotions, August may be able to better understand and communicate how he feels about the change.
“August has spent most of his life as a brother, so although he is unlikely to have a clear memory of Ernest’s arrival when he was two, being an older sibling is already a familiar part of his life.
“For Ernest, the transition may be more difficult to understand. At three, children are still developing their understanding of permanence and future change,” she began, pointing out that even Eugenie and Jack’s conversations about their expanding family may not have computed a permanent change in Ernest’s mind.
As a result, he could have “quite intense emotional responses to changes in familiar routines.” One example is the school pickup or bedtime routine, when a child may suddenly insist on one particular parent.
© Instagram“They may become very distressed if that parent is unavailable, or show a disproportionately strong reaction” when the “wrong” parent tries to help.
Reassuring parents such as Eugenie and Jack, the child psychologist explained: “These responses are not necessarily about the parent who is collecting them. They can reflect a young child’s need for reassurance and predictability at a time when their understanding of what is happening is still developing.
“We may also see temporary regression, increased clinginess or greater emotional volatility. Sleep can be affected too, particularly if the baby’s night waking disrupts the older children’s sleep.”
August’s crucial role in helping Ernest with the new family dynamics
During this time of “significant change”, Ernest and August may rely on each other, with the older brother leading the way through example. Insisting this change doesn’t have to be viewed negatively, Dr Sasha said: “The arrival of a new baby gives [Ernest] another position within the family. He is no longer simply the younger brother following August’s lead.
© Instagram“He is now also someone’s older brother, which may create new opportunities for independence, confidence and a sense of who he is within the family.
“At the same time, the relationship between the two boys provides an important source of continuity. They have a shared history, routines and experiences that the new baby does not have. Protecting some of that existing relationship while the family adjusts can help preserve a sense of familiarity.”
How Eugenie and Jack can help the family transition go smoothly
August is not the only one who will be helping Ernest through this change. As parents, Princess Eugenie and Jack will naturally have to tweak their distribution of attention from two to three children, but they can help their little boys feel involved in the change.
“It is entirely normal for older siblings to find aspects of that adjustment difficult. The aim is not to recreate exactly what family life looked like before the baby’s arrival, but to provide enough consistency and emotional availability for children to feel secure within the change,” she said, suggesting parents continue the same bedtime routines and school run rituals both before and after the baby’s birth for predictability.
“Parents cannot realistically provide exactly the same level of attention once they have a newborn. What they can provide is continuity, so that children experience that although the family’s circumstances have changed, their relationships with their parents remain reliable and emotionally available,” Sasha continued.
Why August and Ernest shouldn’t be labelled ‘good big brothers’
© InstagramHowever, she warned that there is an important distinction between inclusion and responsibility. According to the expert, children adapting to a newborn in the family should be given the opportunity to choose whether they get involved in everyday tasks with the baby, and to what extent.
Dr Sasha pointed out that picking an outfit or fetching a nappy is an easy way for the older children, in this case Eugenie’s sons, to feel as though they have a place in the new family dynamic. Ultimately, pressure is one of the biggest problems that could unintentionally arise in these situations.
“They should not feel that they need to be endlessly gentle, helpful or interested in the baby.
“I would also be cautious about placing too much emphasis on being a ‘good big brother’. A child’s sense of belonging should not depend on how well they perform that role,” Dr Sasha said.
Allowing children to feel different emotions is part of the adjustment process, she concluded. “They can feel affection towards their baby sister, frustration about the changes she brings, excitement about being a big brother and a desire for their parents’ attention. Those feelings can coexist, and making room for that complexity is part of supporting a healthy adjustment.”
